Project Title: Love Yourself. Accept Yourself. Trust Yourself.
Date: March 5th, 2018
[Recording starts 0:00:00]
Susie: Hey guys hello Max and I are here from our villa in Greece or Tuscany or whatever that is.
Max: Wall papered street here. It’s pretty obvious.
Susie: Good to laugh. Yeah it’s only see like the wrinkled over there it’s pretty funny.
Max: Well I said no fun though spectra 00:25.
Susie: Anyway I’ve been noticing hey Cynthia I’ve been noticing some of you talking about loving yourself or you know accepting who you are and just this morning I had a conversation with max about that for myself. So I wanted to come share about loving yourself accepting yourself just how you are because you know it’s always a relevant topic and some of us aren’t very good at it. So we want to kind of make a distinction between complacency accepting yourself the way you are just because you accept yourself the way you are doesn’t mean that you are lazy or complacent or you don’t look at your shadow. That’s not what this is about. So we want to talk about what it really is about.
Susie: By the way we’re almost done with our 40 days of self-love in the creation temple Facebook group but you are welcome to join that group any time and look back at the previous posts you can get some ideas about how to love yourself and accept yourself. So what is self-acceptance?
Max: So self-acceptance is I suppose it’s a form of allowing whatever you’re experiencing in this moment to be as it is not not having this resistance or rejection to like you know like if you have if you have like self-defeating thoughts be like okay that’s part of an expression of myself and so having that space of being willing to understand yourself being willing to hear yourself being allowing of your self-expression and not having to to suppress or defeat what you what you see is negative or bad right. And then from there from that space of compassion understanding then making a choice and how to move forward and how to grow and how to change.
Susie: So self-acceptance involves compassion.
Susie: Well okay just do that wonderful 02:46 that’s good.
Max: Yes I mean because compassion is all about understanding why different parts of yourself act out the way they do right. So.
Susie: And you know I wanted to talk about this also because some of you are you know you’ve had hard lives or you’ve you’ve had trauma we’ve all had trauma you’ve had trauma that still you know active within your cellular memory maybe you’re young and you haven’t like quite come into yourself and really accepted who you are or maybe you’re you know a very sensitive being like me and you have trouble with that or maybe you’re older and all your life you have hated yourself or felt guilty or never really fully accepted yourself and so wanted to kind of break it down so that you could really come into that space of loving acceptance of yourself and that compassion bringing compassion I like that. Yeah.
Max: Yeah. So you wanted to talk about certain distinction.
Susie: Right. So allowing what is occurring in the moment and allowing whether it’s you know something internal or something that you’re seeing external. Acceptance doesn’t mean that you are you know that you sit back and you’re complacent with it. Acceptance means that you find a space within yourself it’s like you’re finding that peace within yourself where you are loving yourself you’re loving what is in the moment instead of trying to change it. Maybe it serves a purpose. Maybe that challenge or mastery opportunity as I like to call it is there for a reason. And so accepting it doesn’t mean that you are you know just resigned to it but it does mean that you allow it to unfold and even work with it.
Max: Right so it’s a difference between resisting the thing that maybe you’re wanting to be different or wanting to be more clear in yourself rather the other way of navigating is to collaborate with it right. To see you know why it is the way it is and what it needs to to have to be okay with change right. For that part of yourself to be okay with change yeah.
Susie: Yeah. So we share the example this morning.
Max: All right. Yeah.
Susie: So I was having this long conversation with max. It was kind of coaching me on trusting myself and so I’m experiencing in my body my body is very sensitive it processes everything it processes every energy it processes the universe you know I just I feel everything in my body and on the one hand that’s really cool because it you know it’s a skill that I have when I’m working with clients to to be able to feel deeply whatever they’re feeling things that they you know that I need to bring to their attention that are in their shadow that they may not recognize. On the other hand for me it’s sometimes very challenging because my body’s like you know kind of reactive all the time to everything and you know I’m always asking for ease and grace ease and grace and then I was like I was like well what if what if this makes me stronger and I don’t actually want ease and grace. And what if this isn’t about we thought the issue that I was working with was about trusting myself but what it came down to is actually accepting my body the way it is accepting how it functions accepting its sensitivity accepting the messages it gives me and and honouring that and it’s just as soon as I figured that out it was like oh this is about just loving myself and accepting myself the way I am. And and trusting myself because I’m trusting that my body is doing what it needs to do for me. I’m trusting that I’m listening to my body’s messages and I take inspired action to you know change something if something needs to be changed. Yeah and that’s a very loving thing to do when you can trust yourself when you can accept yourself. So my I’m just sharing an example you may have a situation where you know maybe a client’s beating you up and it’s like you know there maybe there trigger triggering you and you’re not sure like is this something I need to look at or do I just need to accept myself and trust myself that I’m doing the right thing or you know maybe you’re having an issue with a family member and you don’t quite know how to accept the situation and again it doesn’t mean that you just you know go into complacency and throw your hands up in the air like well this is just the way it is you know. There’s always something you can do in the situation to become more of a mastery with those opportunities that come in your way.
Max: I guess another perspective of it could be like where where someone’s expressing something that is you know constrictive and suppressive you know either in their to their own selves or to others and having acceptance of that expression is not the same as how would you say giving so giving it power right and so.
Susie: That’s a good one.
Max: Right and so the so there’s this you know expression you know an example would be a parent abusing a child right. That happens quite often right. And so you allow that expression being that the parent is acting out and the child is you know they’re participating with whatever the soul chose in that situation and you still show up in your power you know. What do you do you feel inspiration to share advice or assistance for for them to grow to change or do you not feel that inspiration and still not give power to what that person is expressing and let that pull your energy down right. So there’s the difference between accepting and allowing each and their expression but there’s there’s a difference between that and giving it power right and letting that be sort of like running the show. So it’s.
Susie: It’s a rough example man.
Max: Right so it’s allowing it’s allowing your your expression and their expression to show up as equals right. And asnd participating in that you know that co-creation if you are inspired if you are resonant with that expression.
Susie: So this is good for empaths right because we’re all the time feeling other people’s energy and other people’s emotion and if we’re not clear about what which energy is ours we can very easily kind of be like dragged along by the emotions and energies of others.
Max: Because in that example right a lot of people feel like very like well I need to step in right that idea. But that can become a pattern itself and you can fall into what is like the the hero pattern or the rescue pattern where you try and solve all the problems and so that’s sort of how how that can get out of balance as well. And so to always check in is this what resonates with my my inspiration of what I’m wanting to participate in and for some people’s it’s yes and for some people it’s no and and not to judge yourself if it is no right. You like you know that’s playing out and you know trusting again this is trust that all will unfold in in divine order in resonance right. And that each will have what they need to move forward and grow and so only checking in with where your part is in that in the whole.
Susie: And that’s you know and this goes probably back to a different video. But that’s where it’s important to know what is your energy and what is the energy of other that’s not you. Because when you can make that distinction as an empath then you can say oh that’s their expression. I don’t need to be affected by what they’re expressing. I can stay centered within my own energy and I can accept myself in the process because a lot of times for empaths this self-love self-acceptance self-trust thing gets convoluted by the energies they’re feeling around them. Like it might not even be you that you know when you’re feeling the energy of distrust or you’re feeling the energy of non-acceptance that might not even be your energy. So again in another video but important to understand that that can be part of what you may be feeling in the moment.
Max: And so plays into accepting that that can’t happen that does happen and also a practice to go with that is holding space for yourself right. Allowing allowing yourself to have space. Another form of acceptance another form of allowing. Saying it’s it’s okay to add space for yourself.
Susie: Exactly. This is and this is another thing I was thinking about too is accepting yourself where you are in the process. So if you are an empath and you haven’t mastered being with your own energy to accept yourself like hey I’m not there yet. If there’s something that like you know like your end goal or you know where you could be and you’re not there yet to accept yourself where you are in the process. I remember one of my you know 5d brothers was sharing something with me and like saying how I should be doing it or could be doing it and I said yes and I’m not yet integrated with the step that comes before that and I accept that within myself that that’s where I am right now on this moment but it was actually really powerful for me to do that instead of beating myself up and be like yeah I should be doing that. Like no I’m not there yet you know I’m still integrating this this step that goes before that so accepting where you are in the journey accepting you where you are in the process especially this messages for those of you who are maybe newly awakening or you know you’ve been on the journey for a while and things have been really challenging because you are deeply sensitive or whatever. Accepting where you are in your spiritual journey and you know trusting. Trusting yourself in that and loving yourself as you go through the journey because you know you are where you are and you can and it doesn’t mean again that you sit back and you’re just like oh well this is the best I can do. Like no there’s always more inner work that you can do on yourself to propel yourself forward to the next step.
Max: So what what is it whenever someone has this idea of a certain ways things should be it should.
Susie: Should is not acceptance.
Max: It should like a source not acceptance right it should like a form of some some form of invalidating what someone’s a either yourself or like.
Susie: It’s a way of invalidating the experience and validating who you are even that’s something man I I work with that a lot actually because I know who I am and I know where I’m going and clearly I’m not there yet and so that’s something that’s something I process a lot actually is.
Susie: Should yeah I should be like much further along than where I am I talk with my mentor about this all he’s probably tired of hearing it from me. I should be you know like 10 years ahead of where you or whatever and it’s just you know that’s not how life works. Like you could only do so much from your end right you can’t you can’t control everything else you can’t control the timing you can’t orchestrate all the other moving pieces that need to come into alignment. Like it’s amazing where I am if I look back on my whole life and what I’ve accomplished it’s really amazing. And instead of saying I should be much further along than I am I can just you know be grateful and accept myself this is where I am this is I’ve come a long long way it’s pretty amazing.
Max: Accepting your journey accepting where you are on the journey.
Susie: Trusting myself yeah. So I haven’t seen any questions you know been kind of looking at the comments limit I haven’t seen any questions you guys have any questions about this topic so flow self-trust self-acceptance. Any questions. If not we’ll probably end the video but thank you for me and listening me max.
Max: Well thank you. Yeah.
Susie: I hope that by watching this that you can truly look within yourself and ask yourself you know are there any parts of myself that I’m not accepting am I for example are there aspects of my life that I’m not accepting are there shadow aspects that I’m trying to push away or not accepting. It goes both ways right sometimes we’re just as you know reluctant to integrate our light as we are our shadow. So ask yourself are there any parts of myself that I’m not accepting and and give it an honest inquiry because what it will show you if there are parts of yourself that you’re not accepting it will show you what you can work with next. Because yeah I see the question so if when you ask yourself that question it will show you what you have to work with next because there’s always more okay. So what do you do if you’re feeling impatient with your process? Well for me a great practice is gratitude and acknowledging and honouring myself how far I’ve come and what I have done. So looking looking back this is where looking at your past can be healthy I believe. Looking back and saying oh yeah I’ve done this I completed that project I helped that person I you know it used to be this kind of person and now and this person look at your progress look at what you have accomplished and achieved. And yes continue to hold that vision of who you know that you are. Continue to to honour yourself by holding the vision of who you are and instead of you know beating yourself up for not being where you think you should be be grateful to yourself for what you have done okay. So what if you’re feeling inadequate because you’re not moving fast enough. Yeah yeah. Same answer. Use that as your fuel that feeling of being inadequate that feeling of not moving fast enough. That feeling in your body you know you feel the angst of that you feel the frustration or the anger or whatever that feeling or emotion is that comes up when you feel inadequate because you’re not moving fast enough that is your fuel that is what propels you to move forward. And so instead of allowing instead of allowing yourself to get frustrated frustrated and actually hold yourself back use that emotion and channel that emotional energy to propel yourself forward. And then you actually might start moving faster than than you feel where before. What would you like to say?
Max: So that can turn into just forcing it harder in the act of frustration so.
Susie: When I say challenge and use it yeah I’m not talking about forcing. Yeah it’s like harness harness their motion instead of letting it be an emotional leak or an energy leak. Harness the emotion of feeling inadequate and put it in your heart and use it to fuel yourself.
Max: And and so here’s the question what what is adequacy. What is that?
Susie: Yeah exactly.
Max: Adequacy is that should thing again this is a judgment of work right. If you know if you’re experiencing what you’re experiencing and you’re choosing what you’re choosing and you feel that you’re in integrity but you will feel that there has not been enough change or it’s it’s out of balance in some way in that manner it’s this lack of acceptance in some way of where you are with with your process right and so how do I say that it’s you can’t be any further than you already are because you already are where you are and so there there isn’t a difference to be held in wait. Because it’s it already is as it is. And so you’re essentially just throwing yourself into these sort of waited states these states of bringing your energy down but but that doesn’t actually serve the process of moving forward right. So it’s.
Susie: That’s that’s that frustration thing that I mentioned. Like when you allow yourself to become frustrated that’s when the energy starts to turn in on itself.
Max: Right so it’s it’s accepting how you are in this moment how your situation is in this moment and from that point choosing and standing in your choice standing in your knowing trusting yourself and I’m moving from that point and not having it be about the point where you’re at is is lesser or not good enough or any of that yeah because the first step of it is to accept it as it is and then move from there. And so.
Susie: You’re perfect the way you are by the way. This is something I wanted to say at the very beginning actually that’s your perfect the perfect you’re perfect the way you are. And again it doesn’t mean that you don’t look at your shadow that you don’t work with integrating more light but to to know like at your core you’re actually pretty perfect now someone wanted to us to address unconditional self-love versus conditional love. And there was another question coming up where does the idea of unworthiness come from okay so we’ll get to that one. Okay so conditional self-love versus unconditional.
Susie: What can we say about that to me it’s pretty self-explanatory because if you have if you have conditional self-love you’re putting your conditions on it. Like I love myself when or I love myself more if or I love myself if that person reflects it back to me that that I’m worthy of love. You know those conditions that we put on love or self-love when you when you truly love yourself without condition you’re simply honouring yourself.
Max: When when the when love is not seen as a condition but rather a.
Susie: You mean an outcome?
Max: Right when it’s not seen as like an action or or an engagement but rather the very foundation of what you are the very substance.
Susie: Yes yes yes. Good good good.
Max: Right and so before anything even happens you’re already before you choose something you’ve already and so.
Susie: Love isn’t the reward love isn’t the outcome.
Max: Love is the very substance of what you are and so you radiate right.
Susie: You just are love.
Max: Right you radiate that to whatever degree wherever you are with that and that’s that’s the foundation of it. So so love isn’t something you find it’s something you emanate is something you are it’s it’s your substance.
Susie: Oh I love it yes thank you for that reminder yes love it okay. Now I have to scroll back and find that other question because someone is asking about okay. Where does this idea of unworthiness come from how have you cleared that belief in yourselves. And I’m guessing that’s the end of the question because that’s all I can see. So if there’s more sure if you could write the second question again that we got it think it. So where does it come from you know it’s it’s part of the program of this matrix it’s part of the patterning that’s been this is my belief that’s been placed upon us to have us be in that energy of unworthiness to have us accept and allow that we’re unworthy you know obviously just like we’re loved we’re worthy. That’s inherently we’re worthy that’s who we are. So those ideas where do they come from years and years and years and thousands of years of patterning and programming on this planet.
Max: It’s basic it’s it’s experiences of internalizing you know trauma internalizing rejection internalizing you know.
Susie: Not knowing any different.
Max: Mistakes or or what what you would perceive as you were intending one thing and something else happened. So so the thing you intended to good ended up being bad and so you aren’t worthy of being good because you’ve made you know mistakes or things that you find out of balance. And so.
Susie: It’s kind like accepting the pattern. Perpetuating it.
Max: Right and so and so part of part of moving past is accepting mistakes. Accepting those growing pains of learning how to navigate life in this limited experience right. It went sideways.
Susie: Yeah it happened. Someone asked to join and then I don’t know how to fix the screen. Is there anything else you want to say about that?
Max: And and so this accepting of.
Max: Worthiness. Yes. So accepting of your your nature as as divinity right accepting of your origin accepting of in that state yes you are perfect in all knowing and all seeing in all being and in this state it’s more limited. So accepting that this limited state isn’t you know it isn’t an identical reflection of all your qualities but it is something you’ve come down to intimately experience and so not letting that experience have power over your true essence over your true being right. And so that that comes back to giving power and and the acceptance allowing space it all goes together both certainly internally and externally yeah.
Susie: And so the second part of that question was have I cleared that within myself and come into my full worth and I would say honestly I have not. For the most part you know generally in my day-to-day life and you know my experience I feel worthy I feel valuable. But I think there are probably still some shadow aspects of me that I haven’t yet come into my wholeness or my fullness that are still there where there might be some beliefs or a limitations around my worth yeah. How about you?
Max: I feel fully worthy.
Susie: Okay okay so how have you cleared sorry I have to go like this because comments are sideways. How how have you cleared that belief in yourself. I’m truly coming to write 28:44.
Max: It’s you know it’s a process it’s a it’s a practice a lot of it has been simply verbal expression and like proclaiming it like proclaiming yeah proclaiming it’s true and standing in that that knowing and so there is a certain degree of like you have to experience yourself actually being in that space to know it to believe it and and so in part of that you know with certainly expressing to you is expressing to my friend and and you know just being of that knowing of that worth of that and and it’s it’s within that experience of the expression of it that that I truly hear myself I guess that’s part of it is hearing yourself. And and be in that space of proclaiming your worth. Proclaiming your your value. Proclaiming your your right and yourfreedom and your power and and your knowing and your truth. Just proclaiming it and feel it if you observe yourself feel yourself in that moment of expression. And so that’s definitely a very direct way to address that that belief is and and so if you if you hear if you hear hesitancy if you hear like okay like you hear that you know and look into what what you’re feeling there and so it’s in the expression itself that surfaces anything that that’s stifling that that works.
Susie: Right but how do you actually feel worthy if you’re if you’re not feeling worthy?
Max: How do you feel worthy if you’re not feeling worthy.
Susie: Yeah like how do you get to that space of knowing your worth knowing your value if you’re not actually feeling it.
Max: Lots of practice and a process. So in part I guess I guess you would have a journey first of well what things are do you consider in integrity to your worth. Integrity to your value integrity to your nature in your in your expression in your choice right. What are you what are you choosing that is in alignment with with that that value of your true self. And so if there’s if it’s a short list be like okay so look at your choices and look at what you’re choosing and why you’re choosing you’re like and ask yourself can you be more aligned with your truth and your your value inherent in that truth right. More and more.
Susie: Yeah for me it’s been a process actually of releasing all of those things all of the belief systems all of the programs and patterns you know and really seeing who I am to know that I’m valuable to know my worth. It wasn’t actually like trying to to like come into my worth it was a process of clearing away everything that’s not that. So that I could feel my worth more sure I hope that helps.
Male: So so I guess in a way letting go and realizing what what is not you.
Susie: Yeah exactly yeah.
Max: So the patterns the programs the imprints the implants the traumas the you know however many different ways you want to express it the things that aren’t really of your true nature. They’re just things that you’ve picked up along the journey.
Susie: Yeah and honestly doing my inner work doing that work has really boosted my my value my you know I never had like severe self-esteem issues or anything like that but it really boosted my sense of my value and worth. Because I built this really strong muscle to do my inner work to to clear away the stuff that’s not me and it feels good it feels good to have strengthened that it feels good to have built that muscle within myself and I’m gonna answer this question too she was asking if I am always motivated to do my work and yeah it’s a little off topic but that’s okay because I really like this question. Yeah um pretty much yeah and max I think can attest to that because he’s around coaching me through its humble 33:31 a lot of the times. So I’m I’m pretty much always a gamer for it you know because I because I have realized how important it is how good it feels to come out on the other side how much it contributes to the collective when I clear something and within myself and create a template for someone else. Like that that feels good to me. So it’s not always fun to do the inner work but I’m pretty much always motivated to do it. Because.
Max: Because you feel.
Susie: Because that’s me yeah because I feel yeah. Because it’s who I am.
Max: So there’s some people that that don’t feel or that are clouded in their feelings and they just see it as as trudging through all this stuff that they don’t want to look at so.
Susie: Because they’re not doing anything with it. They’re not actually changing themselves right or theirs how would you say there’s there’s people that will try to do the right thing but not actually address what they’re doing and why they’re choosing like they they’re doing what they think they should do but they’re not.
Susie: But they’re not being led by their heart or by inspiration.
Max: Not really integrating why like what is the what is the fulfilling part of that within the self of doing what resonates. Right. And so that that comes back to finding truly what what resonates in your heart to express an experience. And so and if it’s if it’s you know if it goes against social norms if it goes against you know sometimes I can be a bit of a journey to be like okay I’m.
Susie: To accept yourself.
Max: I’m feeling what I’m feeling yes and everyone says all of these other things should be but that’s you know everyone is is individual in their path and journey and in that way we all play different roles. And to accept that we’re all different.
Susie: Yes that comes back to accepting you for who you are the way that you are. Your your body or emotional feel how you’re wired your constitution everything just accepting all of that about yourself and using turning those into strengths using those to your benefit. Like having a sensitive body can be annoying sometimes but on the other hand it’s a really powerful strength when I’m in service. So like we you all have that you know I’m just using my personal example but we all have those things that on one hand it can be a pain in the butt but on the other hand if you take the positive side of it can be something really powerful that you use for your benefit or the benefit of those you serve. So accepting all parts of yourself it’s a beautiful thing.
Male: I guess an analogy an illustrative analogy would be not wanting to take out the trash and it piles up and up and up but the benefit of taking out the trash. That’s been piling up and up and up. It’s something that can be uncomfortable but once is done there’s a much cleaner and clearer space.
Susie: Yes let’s talk it about shadow work.
Max: But that’s the a very direct sort of analogy is you know it’s it’s kind of gross to handle an icky 37:05 and you don’t really want but but as you know you step up you move through it and when it’s all cleaned you have a much cleaner home a much cleaner vessel right.
Susie: You wash your hands afterwards.
Max: You’re free of it you know being on the back of your mind like yeah it’s it’s.
Susie: Yeah take out the trash oh shoot I’ll suppose take out the trash yesterday. It’s like once you do it it’s like ah ha another space to grieve.
Max: And and and so you’re free from a lot of you know if it’s if it’s an issue with with some family drama like to address you know why why is constantly on your shoulders while you’re taking stress about it why while while it’s bringing down you know so it’s like it affects a quality of life a lot.
Susie: Yes absolutely.
Max: And to clear these things is to be free of that and have a better quality of life for yourself so there is a very like you know addressing it has benefit pretty directly.
Susie: Yeah so again some acceptance does not mean that you you know don’t look at it and push it under the rug. It absolutely means that you address anything that comes up.
Max: The acceptance part is picking up the trash not saying that the trash is I accept the trash and it’s such a great thing that’s gonna stay here. The acceptance part is actually picking up and look I’m accepting it I’m holding it and I’m gonna do.
Susie: Like I am accepting it it needs to go out.
Max: And I’m gonna do something with it alright. So that there’s the illustration of acceptance.
Susie: That’s so cute I love it.
Max: You have to accept it you have to pick you up and then you can move it.
Susie: Alright guys I whink we are gonna wrap up now. Really appreciate you being with us today if you have any questions after you know if you’re watching the replay or whatever you can put those in the comments. Lots of love you guys. See you in the next video. Oh if you want help with some of this stuff you can schedule a session I’m here for that.
Max: Oh that’s good.
Susie: So yeah you don’t have to do it by yourself. All right. Love you guys.
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Susie experienced her Spiritual Awakening on December 13th, 2004. Since that time, she has developed into a Spiritual Guide and Transformation Coach, teaching others how to do what she has done in her own life. Are you going through a spiritual awakening? You may enjoy relating the stories of other like you: Awakening Journeys: The Sacred Emerges
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